A comment from a member has made me really think hard as to why I stated this particular topic and his suggeatios regarding analyzing the choices that I had today made me find answer to it.
Yesterday my younger daughter who is 22 and is incidently my second kid, left for her job to a place quite faraway from our hometown. I really wanted to accompany her but as I had the periodical examination of my students fixed on the day and some renovation work was also going on in th kitchen and above all there was a feeling that Anshu i.e. my daughter can take care of herself that made me send her all alone. But later on I started feelinf guilty and moreso when she called me from midway and accused me "for not being with her when she needed me the most".
It is perhaps that I am treating her the same way as I was treated by my own people who thought me to be capable of looking after my ownself whereas the real-me craved for pampering that all females get so easily.
It was this guilt feeling that made me start the blog to find an answer to the querries flooding my mind. How could I do the same things that I blame others to have done to me. Is this the way the cyclic nature of the universe works as well? Can I blame others for the same things that even I do today? And the worst is that i have given her the same nickname that I so hated being given to em in my childhood--KALOO.
How could I be so ruthless--i who prided myself in being so compassionate, caring and loving OR is it also the kind of mask that I have put to hide the real me that is burning with revenge to take from the peole around her. REVENGE-for being ruthless and making me take responsibility when they could hve take nthat and left me to enjoy the life as it came to me!
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